Thursday, April 06, 2006

Late Breaking News

I only have ten minutes to say what I want to say. Perhaps that's a good thing. Perhaps I'll be forced to spit out some clarity from this swirling mess of ideas in my mind.
This week I've been very moved, emotionally and spiritually. God's abundant mercy planned the preaching at our church, ladies' Bible study, life circumstances, and my private devotions to fit together powerfully. One of those life circumstances involved my British literature class.
Once when I was about twelve or thirteen, my dad took us to a spring in Florida to swim. While the river that ran nearby was muddy brown, the water of the spring was clear blue and icy. You could jump off of a bank about twenty feet high into the middle of it. After the sensation of falling through the warm, humid air, hitting that cold water took your breath away. I remember swimming up and up trying to reach the air and the warmth and gasping in great gulps when I reached the surface.
That's how I feel after spending time reading an in-depth survey of the life and works of George Gordon, Lord Byron. Plunged into the horror of out of control sin that was his life, I found myself swimming up as fast as I could, gasping in great gulps of grace. I saw the little rebellions of my life at their final, inevitable result. "This could be me if God let me have my own way." Remorse without repentance. Devastation without compassion. Bitterness without humility. I have more thoughts about this to blog on later, but now I must just express my thankfulness to God for His limitless mercy to me. The goodness of God truly drives me toward repentance.