This is for you, Ann-Marie. But I'm going to be a rule-breaker and not tag anyone else. Also, it's taken me days to do this because I just couldn't think of what to put down.
Link to your tagger and list these rules on your blog. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their name as well as links to their blog. Let them know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
Let's keep it short and simple.
1. I love living in China.
2. I'm allergic to lots and lots of things.
3. I no longer have a favorite color.
4. I start to panic after several hours of shopping.
5. I'm passionate about old people, hospitality, and Chinese noodles (dou shou mian is my favorite so far).
6. I love teaching and HATE grading.
7. I already have my daughter's name picked out, so I sure am hoping that some day I have a daughter.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
Tuesday
I'm often asked by friends in America what exactly I do. So, if I can remember from yesterday, here's a run-down of a typical Tuesday, Wednesday to follow if time allows.
I have freshman video class on Tuesday from 8-9:30. If I leave my room by 7:50, then I will make it down four flights of stairs, across to the other building, and up three more flights to my classroom a few minutes before 8. Falling on the ice or running into someone who wants to talk could delay the process, but it usually works well. This week, I'm preparing the students to watch "It's A Wonderful Life", so I'm teaching the plot and characters of the story. They also are acting out scenes from the movie in groups.
After that class, I usually return to my room (down three, across the yard, up four) to cram for my Chinese lesson at 10. So I run down at 10 to Chinese lesson in the lobby of our building and return to my room at 11. My Chinese lessons are finished for the semester since both my teacher and I are too busy with upcoming exams. So this Tuesday, I was able to run some errands. I tromped up the hill to the dining hall and withdrew money from the ATM on the second floor. I always feel wealthy when seeing my paycheck in Chinese yuan. Then I went into the little convenience store, also on the second floor of the dining hall. I put money on my cell phone bill and bought shampoo. How convenient is that! Then I gave into the urge and walked over to the part where they sell the yummy burrito/wrap things.
The burrito/ wrap people always see me coming from a distance. They know how bad my Chinese is, so they make me the same thing before I even get up to the window sometimes. They're very friendly, and I'm sure they can tell how much I love those things. The outside is like a tortilla, only fried. That's the greasy part. The inside is pretty healthy with lettuce, cilantro, shredded carrots, ham, and other shredded meats. Like Subway, but not, you can choose what you want inside. Yesterday, I wanted to try it with the boiled egg broken up inside, so I had to work fast with my bad Chinese and pointing skills to add something different to my usual order. I'm glad I did, since when I walked down the hill to my dorm and got up to my room, I discovered it was even tastier than normal. Then I called my parents at about 10:40 (it was Monday at 9:40 p.m. their time).
Often, I have plans to eat lunch with students, but yesterday I stayed in my room and graded writing papers, having already eaten the super burrito thing as brunch. I graded until my sleepiness overcame me, and then I tried to take a short nap. Talk about wild dreams, Ann-Marie! I dreamed of fighting cookie-making vampires.
By 1:20, I was going back down, across, and over again to my next freshman video class. This bunch was a little sleepier and so I had to try to perk us all up as we studied "It's A Wonderful Life". At 3, class ended (I totally can say that in Chinese), and I headed off to my office for my weekly office hours.
Since my office computer is all in Chinese, I rarely go there to do work. I work in my room at my desk using my laptop. However, I'm required to go to one afternoon of office hours a week. I'd like it if the Chinese teachers that I share the office with were there (they have class) or if my students came (they often have class), but most of the time, I sit alone, cold and bored. Yesterday I was prepared. I brought lots of papers to grade. However, I was pleasantly surprised when two of my students from the early Tuesday class came to talk to me. Apparently, they've been wanting to talk to me all year but just now found the courage. Emi and Elena are very, very nice girls. They wanted to ask me lots of questions about America and my life and being a teacher and boys. They brought me cute little surprise gifts, and we are going to eat dinner together before the semester ends. I'm going to show them how to make apple pie, and Emi is going to teach us how to make dumplings. (Three cheers for dumplings!)
So after my very enjoyable office hours, Kelly and I went out in the freezing cold darkness to wait for some Chinese teachers that we were going to eat dinner with. Unfortunately, we had the night wrong and will be eating with them on Wednesday instead of Tuesday. So, we decided to walk to eat Xinjiang (western Muslim region of China) food. This was a risky choice since I'd neglected to put long underwear under my dress pants and was freezing to death on the walk to the restaurant. I was revived by the amazing noodles and the good company. After again nearly freezing to death on the way back to our dorm, we parted company to return to our individual tasks of writing exams and grading papers.
I went to bed quite early at around 9 or 9:30 since I knew I had to get up very early at 5. Even though I was so tired, I couldn't sleep until much later. The dorm was loud, and the Pepsi I drank at dinner kicked in. Eventually I fell asleep, only to dream another crazy dream in which I married Melody's brother.
I have freshman video class on Tuesday from 8-9:30. If I leave my room by 7:50, then I will make it down four flights of stairs, across to the other building, and up three more flights to my classroom a few minutes before 8. Falling on the ice or running into someone who wants to talk could delay the process, but it usually works well. This week, I'm preparing the students to watch "It's A Wonderful Life", so I'm teaching the plot and characters of the story. They also are acting out scenes from the movie in groups.
After that class, I usually return to my room (down three, across the yard, up four) to cram for my Chinese lesson at 10. So I run down at 10 to Chinese lesson in the lobby of our building and return to my room at 11. My Chinese lessons are finished for the semester since both my teacher and I are too busy with upcoming exams. So this Tuesday, I was able to run some errands. I tromped up the hill to the dining hall and withdrew money from the ATM on the second floor. I always feel wealthy when seeing my paycheck in Chinese yuan. Then I went into the little convenience store, also on the second floor of the dining hall. I put money on my cell phone bill and bought shampoo. How convenient is that! Then I gave into the urge and walked over to the part where they sell the yummy burrito/wrap things.
The burrito/ wrap people always see me coming from a distance. They know how bad my Chinese is, so they make me the same thing before I even get up to the window sometimes. They're very friendly, and I'm sure they can tell how much I love those things. The outside is like a tortilla, only fried. That's the greasy part. The inside is pretty healthy with lettuce, cilantro, shredded carrots, ham, and other shredded meats. Like Subway, but not, you can choose what you want inside. Yesterday, I wanted to try it with the boiled egg broken up inside, so I had to work fast with my bad Chinese and pointing skills to add something different to my usual order. I'm glad I did, since when I walked down the hill to my dorm and got up to my room, I discovered it was even tastier than normal. Then I called my parents at about 10:40 (it was Monday at 9:40 p.m. their time).
Often, I have plans to eat lunch with students, but yesterday I stayed in my room and graded writing papers, having already eaten the super burrito thing as brunch. I graded until my sleepiness overcame me, and then I tried to take a short nap. Talk about wild dreams, Ann-Marie! I dreamed of fighting cookie-making vampires.
By 1:20, I was going back down, across, and over again to my next freshman video class. This bunch was a little sleepier and so I had to try to perk us all up as we studied "It's A Wonderful Life". At 3, class ended (I totally can say that in Chinese), and I headed off to my office for my weekly office hours.
Since my office computer is all in Chinese, I rarely go there to do work. I work in my room at my desk using my laptop. However, I'm required to go to one afternoon of office hours a week. I'd like it if the Chinese teachers that I share the office with were there (they have class) or if my students came (they often have class), but most of the time, I sit alone, cold and bored. Yesterday I was prepared. I brought lots of papers to grade. However, I was pleasantly surprised when two of my students from the early Tuesday class came to talk to me. Apparently, they've been wanting to talk to me all year but just now found the courage. Emi and Elena are very, very nice girls. They wanted to ask me lots of questions about America and my life and being a teacher and boys. They brought me cute little surprise gifts, and we are going to eat dinner together before the semester ends. I'm going to show them how to make apple pie, and Emi is going to teach us how to make dumplings. (Three cheers for dumplings!)
So after my very enjoyable office hours, Kelly and I went out in the freezing cold darkness to wait for some Chinese teachers that we were going to eat dinner with. Unfortunately, we had the night wrong and will be eating with them on Wednesday instead of Tuesday. So, we decided to walk to eat Xinjiang (western Muslim region of China) food. This was a risky choice since I'd neglected to put long underwear under my dress pants and was freezing to death on the walk to the restaurant. I was revived by the amazing noodles and the good company. After again nearly freezing to death on the way back to our dorm, we parted company to return to our individual tasks of writing exams and grading papers.
I went to bed quite early at around 9 or 9:30 since I knew I had to get up very early at 5. Even though I was so tired, I couldn't sleep until much later. The dorm was loud, and the Pepsi I drank at dinner kicked in. Eventually I fell asleep, only to dream another crazy dream in which I married Melody's brother.
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
Follow Up Quizzes
So last night, I was lying in bed before I fell asleep, and I started laughing out loud. Not the good kind of laughing, the sad, "of course" kind of laughing. It was during the time when you review the day, when you evaluate or think over what just happened. I know, a wiser person would think over things before they happen. Anyway, I was thinking over my day, and I was struck with the depth of my own self-absorption as displayed in several conversations and situations. Truly I often act as if it's all about me.
It would be nice to continue on in the glow of a spiritual victory for a few days, but the reality is that moments later I'm rediscovering the depths of my own sinfulness. Moment by moment, I'm supposed to be focused on Him, not on me.
It would be nice to continue on in the glow of a spiritual victory for a few days, but the reality is that moments later I'm rediscovering the depths of my own sinfulness. Moment by moment, I'm supposed to be focused on Him, not on me.
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
A-
How often is it that you really are aware of the exact time when you learn a life lesson? How often do you feel yourself passing the test at last? For a month or so now, I've been given the opportunity to go through an experience that I've had several times before. The kind of life experience that I've managed to bungle each time with my own sinfulness. Not trusting, not obeying, not pr-ing, not listening have all contributed to my previous failures. So this time, at 31 years of age, I passed a certain life situation test at last. It is all grace. All grace. All grace.
I was able to see clearly the situation coming. (There is so much to be said for experience.) I was able to realize my own inability and ask for wisdom and advice. I was able to obey and to follow advice. I was able to balance risk and control. I was able to face disappointment with confidence in His direction and contentment, no, joy, in His plan. My words were submitted to Him. My pride was temporarily subdued. My hope is still intact.
I know that tomorrow I'll move on to another life lesson-- that again I may fail the first one or two or ten times. But one passing grade is still miraculous. Especially since it wasn't my strength, wisdom, or patience. Have I mentioned grace?
In one area of my life, I have grown and now can see the fruit of that growth. It's overwhelming to consider how many mistakes and talks with wiser friends and prs and apologies and tears and regrets went into this one positive step. If only I had learned sooner. But I look forward with hope to celebrating His continuing work in me.
I was able to see clearly the situation coming. (There is so much to be said for experience.) I was able to realize my own inability and ask for wisdom and advice. I was able to obey and to follow advice. I was able to balance risk and control. I was able to face disappointment with confidence in His direction and contentment, no, joy, in His plan. My words were submitted to Him. My pride was temporarily subdued. My hope is still intact.
I know that tomorrow I'll move on to another life lesson-- that again I may fail the first one or two or ten times. But one passing grade is still miraculous. Especially since it wasn't my strength, wisdom, or patience. Have I mentioned grace?
In one area of my life, I have grown and now can see the fruit of that growth. It's overwhelming to consider how many mistakes and talks with wiser friends and prs and apologies and tears and regrets went into this one positive step. If only I had learned sooner. But I look forward with hope to celebrating His continuing work in me.
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
You Rock, 4th Floor!
Things you share with me: laughter, hall parties, the good bread, music, technological genius, downloaded movies, lesson plans, advice, mashed potatoes, chocolate, tea, Cambodian silk for a tree skirt, a scarf, sun-dried tomatoes, Finding Nemo, sarcasm, homemade chocolate chip cookies, chai, a turtle, breakfasts, lunches, dinners, late night snacks, students, laughter, toothbrushes (not literally), a stuffed sheep, sermons, forks, patience, shopping trips, time, a paper cutter...
I'm thankful for you all so much.
I'm thankful for you all so much.
Thankful, So Thankful
Once again, it's been a long while since I blogged.
This morning, I woke very early to a headache and the upstairs neighbor making too much noise again. I returned to bed after medicating myself and waited there for the students' exercise music to start on the loudspeakers outside. "Happy Thanksgiving," I told myself. And suddenly I was swamped with thankfulness.
I look around this comfortable, little apartment with the festive Christmas tree and the messy kitchen. Physically, I have everything I need and pretty much anything I could want, right down to fresh pumpkin to make pie tonight. I'm surrounded by friends that love me and encourage me. My brothers and sisters here are gracious and precious. I get to teach students that try to learn and that randomly take my picture like I'm a superstar. My family and church family are far away geographically but very near in spirit.
And I am forgiven, justified, beloved. I'm part of the Vine. I'm guarded by the Shepherd. I eat the Bread and drink the Water of Life. I have an inheritance and a home. I have a Father, a Brother, a Comforter.
Bless the L, O my soul, and all that is within me! Bless His holy Name!
This morning, I woke very early to a headache and the upstairs neighbor making too much noise again. I returned to bed after medicating myself and waited there for the students' exercise music to start on the loudspeakers outside. "Happy Thanksgiving," I told myself. And suddenly I was swamped with thankfulness.
I look around this comfortable, little apartment with the festive Christmas tree and the messy kitchen. Physically, I have everything I need and pretty much anything I could want, right down to fresh pumpkin to make pie tonight. I'm surrounded by friends that love me and encourage me. My brothers and sisters here are gracious and precious. I get to teach students that try to learn and that randomly take my picture like I'm a superstar. My family and church family are far away geographically but very near in spirit.
And I am forgiven, justified, beloved. I'm part of the Vine. I'm guarded by the Shepherd. I eat the Bread and drink the Water of Life. I have an inheritance and a home. I have a Father, a Brother, a Comforter.
Bless the L, O my soul, and all that is within me! Bless His holy Name!
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Once upon a blog
Tonight I wanted to share with a young friend, an aspiring poet, some of my old poetry to encourage her along. So I decided to look up The Old Blog. The old blog is where I used to post things, before I broke it while trying to give it a new format (long story involving technically difficulties). When I found the old blog, I found several years of my life that I'd not exactly forgotten, but definitely put out of mind. I remembered that I used to be a writer. I was able to see the preserving Providence that has guided and sustained and led me. While I'd love to somehow move all the old archives from The Old Blog to here, I know that wouldn't be wise to re-send that stuff across the web from my current location. But if you want to get to know me or remember how much He's done, you're welcome to read The Old Blog yourself.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Just in case I was worried...
I know for sure I am loved! Deb made this unbelievable pumpkin for the annual WW contest in honor of me. She says the characters say, "Karyn, I miss you!" Amazing.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Questions My Students Ask
I've been here three months now. As expected, it's about time for a little bump or two in adjusting. It's the time when your mind seems to say, "Wow, that was fun. Now it's time to go home." And you tell yourself, "No, this is home." I haven't experienced as much struggle with this as I thought that I would, but lately I do find myself struggling a bit inside and recognize it as this phase of adjusting. I am very thankful for past experiences (hurrah BYWAV!) that help me to understand a little of what I'm going through and to deal with it better.
On the lighter side, I often each lunch with different groups of my students. They ask me lots of questions. Here are some that are very common:
1. Why did you come to China?
2. How long have you been in China?
3. How long will you stay?
4. Do you like China?
5. Do you like Chinese food?
6. Can you speak any Chinese?
7. Are you married?
8. What are you looking for in a man? (girls always ask this one)
9. Would you marry a Chinese man? (this is often the follow up to #8)
10. Are you a Chr?
11. Where have you traveled in China?
Less common but actually asked:
1. Do you go to ch every week in America? Why?
2. Why do Americans celebrate Chr-mas?
3. Do you believe in Santa?
4. Do you think Chinese people are beautiful?
5. Would you vote for Obm since he is black? Aren't all black Americans dangerous? (I about fell over with this question. After asking questions myself, I found that this view came from what this person saw in American movies/ hip hop music videos.)
6. Do all American students have sex before marriage "like on tv"? (when I answered "not all", they actually didn't believe me. "Are you sure?" "Yes. I'm pretty sure," I said. "Many do, but not all.")
Another question my students often ask, since I teach freshmen video English, is if I could recommend any good movies for them to watch. So I'm compiling a list of clean and interesting movies that I can recommend when asked. Let me know if you have any suggestions.
On the lighter side, I often each lunch with different groups of my students. They ask me lots of questions. Here are some that are very common:
1. Why did you come to China?
2. How long have you been in China?
3. How long will you stay?
4. Do you like China?
5. Do you like Chinese food?
6. Can you speak any Chinese?
7. Are you married?
8. What are you looking for in a man? (girls always ask this one)
9. Would you marry a Chinese man? (this is often the follow up to #8)
10. Are you a Chr?
11. Where have you traveled in China?
Less common but actually asked:
1. Do you go to ch every week in America? Why?
2. Why do Americans celebrate Chr-mas?
3. Do you believe in Santa?
4. Do you think Chinese people are beautiful?
5. Would you vote for Obm since he is black? Aren't all black Americans dangerous? (I about fell over with this question. After asking questions myself, I found that this view came from what this person saw in American movies/ hip hop music videos.)
6. Do all American students have sex before marriage "like on tv"? (when I answered "not all", they actually didn't believe me. "Are you sure?" "Yes. I'm pretty sure," I said. "Many do, but not all.")
Another question my students often ask, since I teach freshmen video English, is if I could recommend any good movies for them to watch. So I'm compiling a list of clean and interesting movies that I can recommend when asked. Let me know if you have any suggestions.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
A Letter to My Teacher
Dear Dr. _________,
I'm wondering if you remember the conversation we had earlier this
year when I visited Northland. I told you that I often use things
about culture that I learned in your World Geography class in my job
in long term care. I was there at Northland to meet with someone
about teaching in China. The years I spent working in long term care
were part of my preparation, I think. I've been here in China for
three months now. It's overwhelming to me how each little step on the
long road from Northland to here, even the steps that I believed were
detours, was necessary and important.
I was reminded of you this afternoon. I was invited to be part of an
extra-curricular English language club on the campus of a university
nearby the one where I teach. Today was the first meeting, and the
organizers and myself were all surprised that several young men from
Xinjiang province joined us. They are Chinese by nationality, but not
by race or custom. They're from the Uygher minority and are Muslim.
These guys today have only been learning English for one year but had
better oral English than most of my students who have been studying
for many years. After the meeting, one of the young men was talking
with me and some other Chinese students. The Chinese students were
discussing how Chinese people choose their names for meaning while
Americans do not.
"Most Americans choose a name based on how it sounds, and if they like
it," I said.
"We are like that, too, where I am from," the young man from Xinjiang
said. "We choose our names from a book." He looked at me. "It's an
important book." I don't think he knew the name in English. "Do you
know this book?" he asked me.
I took a guess. "The Koran?" I said.
"Yes! That is the book. Do you know it?"
Right then I just wanted to jump up and down and say thank you for
Middle Eastern History class, but I stayed cool.
"Yes, I've read it."
This was so shocking to him, but he was really excited. I left out
the part where I was forced to read it for a class and just felt so
thankful for providence.
"You have a book, too," he said.
"Yes, the B-----. Many of the people mentioned in the Koran are
talked about in it."
We talked for a few minutes about different stories that are mentioned
in both books.
"I have always wanted to read the B," he said, "to find out what
things are same."
Our conversation continued. The young man and his friends exchanged
contact info with me and with the other American guy teacher who was
there. He invited me to eat with them at a Xinjiang restaurant and
talk more. Perhaps in the future this young man will read the similar
Book. Perhaps a door has been opened.
I wanted to write you to say thank you for the time you invested in my
life. Thanks for the work that went into each class, especially
Middle Eastern History. I hope that the lessons I learned so long ago
will continue to become more and more relevant in my life.
Sincerely,
Karyn
I'm wondering if you remember the conversation we had earlier this
year when I visited Northland. I told you that I often use things
about culture that I learned in your World Geography class in my job
in long term care. I was there at Northland to meet with someone
about teaching in China. The years I spent working in long term care
were part of my preparation, I think. I've been here in China for
three months now. It's overwhelming to me how each little step on the
long road from Northland to here, even the steps that I believed were
detours, was necessary and important.
I was reminded of you this afternoon. I was invited to be part of an
extra-curricular English language club on the campus of a university
nearby the one where I teach. Today was the first meeting, and the
organizers and myself were all surprised that several young men from
Xinjiang province joined us. They are Chinese by nationality, but not
by race or custom. They're from the Uygher minority and are Muslim.
These guys today have only been learning English for one year but had
better oral English than most of my students who have been studying
for many years. After the meeting, one of the young men was talking
with me and some other Chinese students. The Chinese students were
discussing how Chinese people choose their names for meaning while
Americans do not.
"Most Americans choose a name based on how it sounds, and if they like
it," I said.
"We are like that, too, where I am from," the young man from Xinjiang
said. "We choose our names from a book." He looked at me. "It's an
important book." I don't think he knew the name in English. "Do you
know this book?" he asked me.
I took a guess. "The Koran?" I said.
"Yes! That is the book. Do you know it?"
Right then I just wanted to jump up and down and say thank you for
Middle Eastern History class, but I stayed cool.
"Yes, I've read it."
This was so shocking to him, but he was really excited. I left out
the part where I was forced to read it for a class and just felt so
thankful for providence.
"You have a book, too," he said.
"Yes, the B-----. Many of the people mentioned in the Koran are
talked about in it."
We talked for a few minutes about different stories that are mentioned
in both books.
"I have always wanted to read the B," he said, "to find out what
things are same."
Our conversation continued. The young man and his friends exchanged
contact info with me and with the other American guy teacher who was
there. He invited me to eat with them at a Xinjiang restaurant and
talk more. Perhaps in the future this young man will read the similar
Book. Perhaps a door has been opened.
I wanted to write you to say thank you for the time you invested in my
life. Thanks for the work that went into each class, especially
Middle Eastern History. I hope that the lessons I learned so long ago
will continue to become more and more relevant in my life.
Sincerely,
Karyn
Friday, October 03, 2008
Monday, September 29, 2008
Saturday, September 27, 2008
Love Comes Softly
Today is Sunday, but it's also Tuesday. You see, this week our university is going to be off for the National Day Holiday. For some reason, though, we can't have the whole week off, only three school days (Wed.-Fri.). So we are switching Monday and Tuesdays classes to the Saturday and Sunday before in order to have our week off. Sound confusing? It is. Confusing and busy.
I was faced with the problem of teaching two video English classes today that will be off schedule with the rest of my freshmen classes. So, I thankfully accepted the advice of veteran teachers and showed an English film. "Love Comes Softly", specifically.
Perhaps you never really enjoy a kid's movie until you watch it with enthusiastic kids. Perhaps you never really enjoy any movie until you watch it with Chinese students. They get more "into" movies than anyone I've seen. This morning, my students giggled at the romantic parts, they gasped aloud at the suspenseful parts, and many of them were wiping away tears at the sad parts. As I watched them experiencing the film, I was drawn into the emotion of the story myself. One character, in particular, displays a calm, confident faith. To many of them, his words and actions were totally different than what they have ever seen. I noticed several of them watching me closely when he shared his beliefs.
And I was so humbled. What do they see when they watch me? They watch me every class just as closely as they were watching that film. Do they see faith, love, and calm confidence? Do they see hypocrisy? Do they see the One that I want them to see or do they only see me?
I was faced with the problem of teaching two video English classes today that will be off schedule with the rest of my freshmen classes. So, I thankfully accepted the advice of veteran teachers and showed an English film. "Love Comes Softly", specifically.
Perhaps you never really enjoy a kid's movie until you watch it with enthusiastic kids. Perhaps you never really enjoy any movie until you watch it with Chinese students. They get more "into" movies than anyone I've seen. This morning, my students giggled at the romantic parts, they gasped aloud at the suspenseful parts, and many of them were wiping away tears at the sad parts. As I watched them experiencing the film, I was drawn into the emotion of the story myself. One character, in particular, displays a calm, confident faith. To many of them, his words and actions were totally different than what they have ever seen. I noticed several of them watching me closely when he shared his beliefs.
And I was so humbled. What do they see when they watch me? They watch me every class just as closely as they were watching that film. Do they see faith, love, and calm confidence? Do they see hypocrisy? Do they see the One that I want them to see or do they only see me?
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
School must have started...
I know this for many reasons. Obviously, one is that I get up and go to class or my office every day. Also, I spend much time working on lesson prep. It's also hard to ignore the thousands of students wandering or jogging or marching around our campus. But if I ignore the obvious facts, feelings alone would convince me that school has started, and I'm actually a teacher again.
I'm sitting on my (totally brand new, cool, and slightly funky smelling) couch. I haven't changed from my work clothes because I'm too tired to move. The kitchen is filthy, the bathroom is scary, and I'm surrounded by student papers, empty glasses, and a box of partially eaten Oreo O cereal. I've got enough energy to move my fingers to type, but not enough to take off my shoes. I know I really should clean or do schoolwork, but I just want to sit here and stare at the wall. Wow! It's that wonderful, familiar exhaustion that I remember from my first stint as a teacher.
There are many differences between my teaching experience years ago and what is happening now. So many changes in the situation, in the location, and even in me. Some noticeable good differences: 1)I've got a seemingly infinitely expanding supply of mooncakes to tide me over should I ever begin to starve 2)The apartment is smaller so there is less to clean should I attempt to clean it 3)I really only prep for two lessons a week. I just teach them over and over. 4)Did I mention the brand new, cool, only slightly smelly couch? 5) I think I'm a better teacher now. PTL!
It was a long day, but it was crowned with a relational breakthrough! Two of my freshmen students (most of whom are still quite nervous to talk to me) came and talked to me for an hour during my office time. We talked about important issues to them: learning English better, life in America, why don't Americans have to learn Chinese in school like they learn English (such a good point), and also how many definitions there might be for the word asset. Then they asked if I would eat dinner with them in the dining hall. Hurrah! Even though, I had to practically jump up and down to keep class 3 awake today, class 2 is eager to eat dinner with me! It is a good start to me having relationships with my students. Another plus of eating with freshmen is that their English does have limits so I learn lots of Chinese words.
So now. Now, I'm going to spend some time cleaning my kitchen and bathroom, watch the first episode of NCIS with Kelly (she's never seen the show!), and then work on the sophomore writing lesson for tomorrow. Also listen to joyful music or a MS podcast. Also avoid talking on skype to Ryan my new (not a stalker, Justin) online friend.
I'm sitting on my (totally brand new, cool, and slightly funky smelling) couch. I haven't changed from my work clothes because I'm too tired to move. The kitchen is filthy, the bathroom is scary, and I'm surrounded by student papers, empty glasses, and a box of partially eaten Oreo O cereal. I've got enough energy to move my fingers to type, but not enough to take off my shoes. I know I really should clean or do schoolwork, but I just want to sit here and stare at the wall. Wow! It's that wonderful, familiar exhaustion that I remember from my first stint as a teacher.
There are many differences between my teaching experience years ago and what is happening now. So many changes in the situation, in the location, and even in me. Some noticeable good differences: 1)I've got a seemingly infinitely expanding supply of mooncakes to tide me over should I ever begin to starve 2)The apartment is smaller so there is less to clean should I attempt to clean it 3)I really only prep for two lessons a week. I just teach them over and over. 4)Did I mention the brand new, cool, only slightly smelly couch? 5) I think I'm a better teacher now. PTL!
It was a long day, but it was crowned with a relational breakthrough! Two of my freshmen students (most of whom are still quite nervous to talk to me) came and talked to me for an hour during my office time. We talked about important issues to them: learning English better, life in America, why don't Americans have to learn Chinese in school like they learn English (such a good point), and also how many definitions there might be for the word asset. Then they asked if I would eat dinner with them in the dining hall. Hurrah! Even though, I had to practically jump up and down to keep class 3 awake today, class 2 is eager to eat dinner with me! It is a good start to me having relationships with my students. Another plus of eating with freshmen is that their English does have limits so I learn lots of Chinese words.
So now. Now, I'm going to spend some time cleaning my kitchen and bathroom, watch the first episode of NCIS with Kelly (she's never seen the show!), and then work on the sophomore writing lesson for tomorrow. Also listen to joyful music or a MS podcast. Also avoid talking on skype to Ryan my new (not a stalker, Justin) online friend.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
First Weeks of School
Joy is right again. I haven't been updating this blog enough. However, I've been quite busy adjusting to my new life here. I'll try to be more faithful with this.
I'm finishing the second week of school here in China. The first week, I only taught two sophomore writing classes. This second week, I've added my six freshmen video classes. Video English uses video clips with the teaching to practice all the language skills together: listening, speaking, reading, and writing. I think I'll really like all of my classes. Most of the freshmen are shy and eager. Many of them have never had a foreign teacher or perhaps even met a foreigner.
I've also begun my own Chinese lessons. Our university has a major for Teaching Chinese as a Foreign Language. The upperclassmen from this major are teaching the foreign teachers Chinese. It helps us because they are well-trained and wanting to practice their skills. It helps them as well. My teacher is a smart and dedicated young lady, and we are both very serious that I will learn as much Chinese as I can. My students also love for me to practice my new words on them. They seem to appreciate that I am trying to learn their language.
The weather here has turned so beautiful. According to local people, this is the best season of the year here. The sky is blue and sunny, but there is a slight coolness in the air. In the next few days, we will be celebrating the Mid-Autumn festival. It has something to do with harvest and full moon. People celebrate by being together with family and by giving moon cakes as gifts. Moon cakes have an interesting design and a sweet filling. So far, I have had the egg filling (ok) and the fruit filling (actually very good), but there are many different kinds of filling. I've been invited to attend a Mid-Autumn party, so I'm looking forward to that.
The other American teachers here have been such an encouragement to me! They've helped me to know where to go and what to do. We spend time together on Sundays and other nights of the week. On Labor Day, we even had a cook-out outside of our building. Several Chinese men stopped by to watch the grilling and give advice to the guy who was cooking hamburgers. It was a classic picnic, ending with S'mores. We had a great time together!
My students and other Chinese friends are also so helpful. Last night, one of the sophomores took another foreign teacher and I with her out to dinner. She showed us a newly opened food court place in our college neighborhood where the students eat. They had all kinds of delicious Chinese foods. She helped us try several things and learn the names so that we can return to eat there on our own. Here in the northeast, people seem to like their foods salty and a little bit spicy. I really enjoy almost all of the food that I've had here.
Well, that's a little bit of an update. I'll try to keep this blog more current. I know that so many of you are thinking of me and supporting me. Your love is so precious to me, and I want to keep you informed of what is happening to me here.
I'm finishing the second week of school here in China. The first week, I only taught two sophomore writing classes. This second week, I've added my six freshmen video classes. Video English uses video clips with the teaching to practice all the language skills together: listening, speaking, reading, and writing. I think I'll really like all of my classes. Most of the freshmen are shy and eager. Many of them have never had a foreign teacher or perhaps even met a foreigner.
I've also begun my own Chinese lessons. Our university has a major for Teaching Chinese as a Foreign Language. The upperclassmen from this major are teaching the foreign teachers Chinese. It helps us because they are well-trained and wanting to practice their skills. It helps them as well. My teacher is a smart and dedicated young lady, and we are both very serious that I will learn as much Chinese as I can. My students also love for me to practice my new words on them. They seem to appreciate that I am trying to learn their language.
The weather here has turned so beautiful. According to local people, this is the best season of the year here. The sky is blue and sunny, but there is a slight coolness in the air. In the next few days, we will be celebrating the Mid-Autumn festival. It has something to do with harvest and full moon. People celebrate by being together with family and by giving moon cakes as gifts. Moon cakes have an interesting design and a sweet filling. So far, I have had the egg filling (ok) and the fruit filling (actually very good), but there are many different kinds of filling. I've been invited to attend a Mid-Autumn party, so I'm looking forward to that.
The other American teachers here have been such an encouragement to me! They've helped me to know where to go and what to do. We spend time together on Sundays and other nights of the week. On Labor Day, we even had a cook-out outside of our building. Several Chinese men stopped by to watch the grilling and give advice to the guy who was cooking hamburgers. It was a classic picnic, ending with S'mores. We had a great time together!
My students and other Chinese friends are also so helpful. Last night, one of the sophomores took another foreign teacher and I with her out to dinner. She showed us a newly opened food court place in our college neighborhood where the students eat. They had all kinds of delicious Chinese foods. She helped us try several things and learn the names so that we can return to eat there on our own. Here in the northeast, people seem to like their foods salty and a little bit spicy. I really enjoy almost all of the food that I've had here.
Well, that's a little bit of an update. I'll try to keep this blog more current. I know that so many of you are thinking of me and supporting me. Your love is so precious to me, and I want to keep you informed of what is happening to me here.
Friday, September 05, 2008
Sunday, August 03, 2008
Friday, August 01, 2008
The End of A Salty Day
Tonight I was walking down the hill from the dining hall with some of my camp students. I looked behind me to see another student running after us. He's a tall, thin guy. Athletic, slouchy, too cool. I haven't been sure he likes me that much. I'm always poking him and saying things like, "Wake up" or "pay attention." His English isn't very good even though he seems smart enough. Today he missed a class. When I gave him a hard time, he said he'd been buying medicine for a cold. Could be. Or he could have been hanging out with his very pretty girlfriend.
So after dinner, there he is running down the hill after me with the pretty girlfriend coming along as fast as she could in her heels. I thought it must be an emergency. When he reached us, he explained in his out-of-breath, poorly pronounced English that his girlfriend was going to walk with me because she wanted to talk to me. Then she came up and so I said that, "sure, she could talk to me." He just smiled and smiled, and then he left the girlfriend to walk back to my dorm with me. She was very nice and had better English, so we talked as we walked along slowly. Where was she from in China? Which school did she attend?
Finally, the suspense was killing me. "So why did you want to talk to me tonight?" I asked.
"He is in your class and he thinks you are nice. He loves you and wanted me to talk to you."
Wow. After lunch, I'd spent time talking to Father about this boy by name, and here was an open door of friendship to him and this sweet girl. As I left her and climbed the steps up to my room, I was pondering the mysteries that still lie behind the certainty that this is where I am supposed to be.
So after dinner, there he is running down the hill after me with the pretty girlfriend coming along as fast as she could in her heels. I thought it must be an emergency. When he reached us, he explained in his out-of-breath, poorly pronounced English that his girlfriend was going to walk with me because she wanted to talk to me. Then she came up and so I said that, "sure, she could talk to me." He just smiled and smiled, and then he left the girlfriend to walk back to my dorm with me. She was very nice and had better English, so we talked as we walked along slowly. Where was she from in China? Which school did she attend?
Finally, the suspense was killing me. "So why did you want to talk to me tonight?" I asked.
"He is in your class and he thinks you are nice. He loves you and wanted me to talk to you."
Wow. After lunch, I'd spent time talking to Father about this boy by name, and here was an open door of friendship to him and this sweet girl. As I left her and climbed the steps up to my room, I was pondering the mysteries that still lie behind the certainty that this is where I am supposed to be.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
For the Aschers
Tonight I introduced three other English teachers to "Up the River and Down the River". It was a huge success!!!! They loved it! I lost-- what's new? It wasn't the same without the Aschers, Mel, Joy, and Henry, but it was a fun game. The legacy lives on.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Last Day of Teacher Training
It's hard to believe that I have been here in CC for two weeks now! Two weeks ago, I was up all night packing and was so exhausted as I ate my last Swedish pancakes for a long time. It seems like much longer than two weeks since I have changed worlds and learned so much. With all the reading and preparation that I did, I haven't been shocked by cultural differences. However, information alone is never enough to give you the experience of a place: its sounds, smells, and sights. My view of China has changed dramatically since before I came and is readjusting every moment. China is bigger and more complicated than I imagined. There are many extremes: rich to poor, high tech to medieval, spicy to sweet. It is also welcoming in many ways. People are so very different and think very differently, but in the end, they are just people. Friendship is just as precious, perhaps more precious.
I have benefited greatly from the training offered by veteran English teachers here. Many things I needed to be reminded of, but lots of things were new and exciting about this field. Teaching here is going to be challenging and rewarding. In the next couple of weeks, we will be practicing what we have learned in an English camp. So, I am going to have to leave this update and put my nose to the lesson planning grindstone.
Thank you so much for all of you who helped me to get here. Formal thank yous are on the way. (Tomorrow I plan to learn where the post office is.) This is an amazing privilege and opportunity, and I hope to keep you updated as much as I am able.
I have benefited greatly from the training offered by veteran English teachers here. Many things I needed to be reminded of, but lots of things were new and exciting about this field. Teaching here is going to be challenging and rewarding. In the next couple of weeks, we will be practicing what we have learned in an English camp. So, I am going to have to leave this update and put my nose to the lesson planning grindstone.
Thank you so much for all of you who helped me to get here. Formal thank yous are on the way. (Tomorrow I plan to learn where the post office is.) This is an amazing privilege and opportunity, and I hope to keep you updated as much as I am able.
Monday, July 14, 2008
Day One of Teacher Training
I find that I am continually surprised by China-- the good kind of surprised. Perhaps this will be a continual state that I will find myself in for years but maybe not. Today, I am surprised that I can blog. So for now you can receive first hand accounts of my adventures. (cue suspenseful organ music: "duh duh duh duh") Yep. I knew you were holding your breath for that news, Ann-Marie.
My brain is on information overload, still processing and trying to understand all that I have heard and seen the last few days. I will try to give a little list before I go to bed.
Things that surprise me about China (in random order, not prioritized or complete):
1. People are still thin here when the food is so amazing. Okay, I'm not too surprised by that since it is obvious that they eat in moderation and are physically working or active in their transportation. But the food is still unbelievable.
2. Sorry to mention it, Joy, but Walmart is still great, even when you have to ride two buses and a light rail to get to it. Chinese Walmart is filled with fascinating foods that I so want to try to cook. They also sell forks; something that was a big concern until I got here and have been eating with chopsticks just fine the whole time. In fact, I may spill less on my clothes in China than I did at home!
3. The students are already welcoming to me. Last night we were out to dinner with several students from surrounding universities. Already I have received a text message from one of them today. One girl took us to visit a gigantic flea market. She helped me get the right bus and then shop for tennis shoes and an umbrella. We even bargained for a cheaper price. While I know that some of them are motivated by a desire to better their English skills, they've still been so gracious and friendly to strangers.
4. This next one is not really a surprise but rather a refreshing reminder. There is a supernatural unity with brothers and sisters that overrides cultural differences, race, financial differences, and even language barriers. We are one in Him.
5. I am surprised that I have been privileged to come here to teach. While I have skills and experience that have prepared me for my tasks, I am completely unworthy to serve with the quality of people that I find on the team here. My inability to to contribute to this high calling which we are striving toward is so obvious to me each day. The only thing that keeps me from panic is the knowledge that actually they, too, are unworthy and unable and are simply recipients together with me of the gift.
I must go to bed now. My body is tired and sore and weary. It is the kind of tired and sore and weary that I know will lead to strength and callouses and endurance, if only I can push my out-of-training self past its lazy limits. My brain is weary, too. Weary with trying to comprehend and stretch and adjust. My soul is... well, my soul is deeply challenged and humbled and rejoicing in hope.
My brain is on information overload, still processing and trying to understand all that I have heard and seen the last few days. I will try to give a little list before I go to bed.
Things that surprise me about China (in random order, not prioritized or complete):
1. People are still thin here when the food is so amazing. Okay, I'm not too surprised by that since it is obvious that they eat in moderation and are physically working or active in their transportation. But the food is still unbelievable.
2. Sorry to mention it, Joy, but Walmart is still great, even when you have to ride two buses and a light rail to get to it. Chinese Walmart is filled with fascinating foods that I so want to try to cook. They also sell forks; something that was a big concern until I got here and have been eating with chopsticks just fine the whole time. In fact, I may spill less on my clothes in China than I did at home!
3. The students are already welcoming to me. Last night we were out to dinner with several students from surrounding universities. Already I have received a text message from one of them today. One girl took us to visit a gigantic flea market. She helped me get the right bus and then shop for tennis shoes and an umbrella. We even bargained for a cheaper price. While I know that some of them are motivated by a desire to better their English skills, they've still been so gracious and friendly to strangers.
4. This next one is not really a surprise but rather a refreshing reminder. There is a supernatural unity with brothers and sisters that overrides cultural differences, race, financial differences, and even language barriers. We are one in Him.
5. I am surprised that I have been privileged to come here to teach. While I have skills and experience that have prepared me for my tasks, I am completely unworthy to serve with the quality of people that I find on the team here. My inability to to contribute to this high calling which we are striving toward is so obvious to me each day. The only thing that keeps me from panic is the knowledge that actually they, too, are unworthy and unable and are simply recipients together with me of the gift.
I must go to bed now. My body is tired and sore and weary. It is the kind of tired and sore and weary that I know will lead to strength and callouses and endurance, if only I can push my out-of-training self past its lazy limits. My brain is weary, too. Weary with trying to comprehend and stretch and adjust. My soul is... well, my soul is deeply challenged and humbled and rejoicing in hope.
Friday, July 11, 2008
I'm here!
As exhausted as I am, I'm kind of numb to the emotions of it all, but I am so thankful to have made it safely here. All of my luggage survived as well. The Korean based airline that I used was very efficient. Their employees were gracious, and they served actual meals on the plane! (United only gave a little bag of pretzels.) It was a bit odd to have a choice of omelet or octopus for breakfast, but I'm sure the omelet was as good as that octopus! (Just kidding.) Coming into the country was easy. A smiling face in the crowd of one of our group leaders was here to meet me at the airport. I've been thinking that my Northland background will stand me in good stead in the cold winters, but today I felt like I'd arrived in Chattanooga. The weather was hot and muggy so that my hair began to afro immediately. I'm staying with another teacher for the first month in her room/ studio apartment. The great news is that this is the campus where I'll be teaching so I'll be living in this building permanently-- only in my own room. The building is simple but very nice.
I've already tasted my first local meal around the corner from the campus where we are staying. The restaurant would be described as a "hole in the wall" here, but I the people were friendly, the dishes were clean, and the food was amazing. My mom would be shocked to see me eating dishes with things such as tofu and eggplant in them, but I've never had tofu and eggplant that tasted yummy before! Things are definitely different here, and I've only begun to experience it. I'm so glad to be here, though, and for all the provision that has been made along the way. I know it's only 7 pm here, but I'm going to bed very soon.
Love to you all,
Karyn
I've already tasted my first local meal around the corner from the campus where we are staying. The restaurant would be described as a "hole in the wall" here, but I the people were friendly, the dishes were clean, and the food was amazing. My mom would be shocked to see me eating dishes with things such as tofu and eggplant in them, but I've never had tofu and eggplant that tasted yummy before! Things are definitely different here, and I've only begun to experience it. I'm so glad to be here, though, and for all the provision that has been made along the way. I know it's only 7 pm here, but I'm going to bed very soon.
Love to you all,
Karyn
Thursday, July 03, 2008
"That's Friendship"
I went over to work this afternoon for the last time before I head to China. I picked up my check and went around saying final goodbyes. Most of my co-workers and I had already said goodbye at other times, and many of the residents had already talked to me at an open house my last week of work. But several residents have become special friends, and it was important to take a few minutes with each one.
Larry is one of my favorite people. I think that I have blogged about him before, perhaps. Five years ago when we met, he was a "volunteer" at the Alzheimer's Center because he was just in the very early stages. He taught me many things about how to run an activity group and how to work with people with dementia. As his Alzheimer's has progressed and changes have occurred in his life, he's taught me other things. Things about love and courage and faithfulness. We have prayed and cried together through some major life changes. It was very hard for us to say goodbye today. He hugged me so tightly that I thought I might break. "I will miss you so much," he said. "But I am so glad for you. This is a good thing that you are doing."
"I will miss you, too," I said back to him. "Don't worry. Before you know it, time will fly by and then I'll be back again for a visit." We smiled at each other through our tears. We both know that in the world of Alzheimer's where he lives, things work differently. When I return, he will have changed. Things will never be the same again.
I walked over to another resident to hug her. A nearby resident assistant patted his shoulder. "Don't cry," she said.
Larry pointed at me. "Do you know what that is?" he asked her. "Do you?" She just looked at him blankly. "That's friendship," he said. "That's friendship."
Friendship is so random sometimes and so precious all of the time. Today I said goodbye to people who are aware and alert, like Roy and Izzy and Ruth and Katie. They will pray for me and miss me and communicate to me while I am gone. But some of my best friends there do not even know my name anymore. Today when I visited though, they looked at my face and smiled. Their eyes lit up with joy. One little ancient Italian lady hugged me and kissed me right on the mouth. "I have missed you," she said. "You didn't come to see me. I must pray for you every day in China." And then she said, "What is your name?"
"You're a good girl," Francis told me for the thousandth time.
I was leaving when I saw Olive. "Hi, Olive," I said after she had gotten a good look at me.
"You look different," she said.
"I cut my hair," I told her, surprised that she would realize anything.
"I don't see the hair," Olive told me. "Just your face."
"How is your day going?"
"Things are different all the time," she told me sadly. And her eyes filled with tears and she put her hands on my arm. "I'm so glad it's you."
Larry is one of my favorite people. I think that I have blogged about him before, perhaps. Five years ago when we met, he was a "volunteer" at the Alzheimer's Center because he was just in the very early stages. He taught me many things about how to run an activity group and how to work with people with dementia. As his Alzheimer's has progressed and changes have occurred in his life, he's taught me other things. Things about love and courage and faithfulness. We have prayed and cried together through some major life changes. It was very hard for us to say goodbye today. He hugged me so tightly that I thought I might break. "I will miss you so much," he said. "But I am so glad for you. This is a good thing that you are doing."
"I will miss you, too," I said back to him. "Don't worry. Before you know it, time will fly by and then I'll be back again for a visit." We smiled at each other through our tears. We both know that in the world of Alzheimer's where he lives, things work differently. When I return, he will have changed. Things will never be the same again.
I walked over to another resident to hug her. A nearby resident assistant patted his shoulder. "Don't cry," she said.
Larry pointed at me. "Do you know what that is?" he asked her. "Do you?" She just looked at him blankly. "That's friendship," he said. "That's friendship."
Friendship is so random sometimes and so precious all of the time. Today I said goodbye to people who are aware and alert, like Roy and Izzy and Ruth and Katie. They will pray for me and miss me and communicate to me while I am gone. But some of my best friends there do not even know my name anymore. Today when I visited though, they looked at my face and smiled. Their eyes lit up with joy. One little ancient Italian lady hugged me and kissed me right on the mouth. "I have missed you," she said. "You didn't come to see me. I must pray for you every day in China." And then she said, "What is your name?"
"You're a good girl," Francis told me for the thousandth time.
I was leaving when I saw Olive. "Hi, Olive," I said after she had gotten a good look at me.
"You look different," she said.
"I cut my hair," I told her, surprised that she would realize anything.
"I don't see the hair," Olive told me. "Just your face."
"How is your day going?"
"Things are different all the time," she told me sadly. And her eyes filled with tears and she put her hands on my arm. "I'm so glad it's you."
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Apples of Gold
Yes, I know it's shocking! Karyn is blogging twice in one day after months of neglecting her blog. Don't get too used to that. It may be a little tricky in the future.
I'm taking a break from sorting through all my worldly belongings, an amazing amount of stuff for one "poor" person. There are three piles (and several sub-piles): stuff to get rid of, stuff to store, stuff to take to China. I'm trying to make the first pile the largest. The Karyn Store is officially open in the empty bedroom that was Joy's. Everything is free while supplies last. First come, first serve. After a day, all unclaimed stuff will be heading to Good Will. Joy already has a whole bunch of stuff from The Karyn Store in a layaway pile.
In my attempt to be ruthless in eliminating stuff from my life, I just finished going through an entire box of papers. I mean, who needs a bunch of old letters and cards anyway? After half an hour, it's obvious: I do. What a blessing to skim through that box! It was like the story of my life there in that box: my life as it has been influenced by hundreds of caring people.
What a hodge-podge and what a treasure! There were birthday cards, valentine cards, graduation cards, and cards for no occasion at all. Notes from teachers, school friends, my parents, college friends. Hilarious letters and really sad letters. So many people I can thank for giving of themselves to me.
I had a birthday card in there for every year while I was growing up from Pastor Roth. There wasn't just a signature, either, but a long note encouraging me each year. "I rejoice to see you following God." "Don't be tempted to become bitter about this situation." "God is our refuge." His were always words that were pointing me to Christ and showing me love and concern.
There are countless letters in that box from my mother. A tiny note of thanks from when I was a little girl and had helped her with something. Long letters while I was away at college. "I cry to think of you being so lonely there, but this is part of God's plan for you. Do not give up." "Always follow Him."
A few precious letters show the amazing person that was my grandma. "I try to grow old gracefully, but then my stubbornness just comes through!" My sisters wrote me the times that I was away from them. "We were talking at youth group about people doing funny things and I told them that you snore but you won't admit it." One very special note is from my daddy who wrote how proud he was of me after I sang in church as a young girl. Notes from my cousins and aunts are special. My "cousin" Phil must win some type of hilarious award because the letter from him at age 13 is so funny! "Guess what we're doing today. Picking beans. It is so booooring!" "Remember how Uncle Earl mows?"
Many of the letters are from friends. I've been overwhelming blessed with fantastic friends. There's a birthday card from my first best friend Andy when I turned four. Maybe his mom wrote it. Through elementary school, high school, and college, I had friends that wrote notes to me in good times and in bad times, encouraging me and loving me. Pleasant has written me letters since third grade. "Love your sis." From when she was first married and her car kept breaking down: "I told Joey that I need a new car and also a cell phone for safety and he said he'd get me a gun. I don't know what good that will do unless I want to start hijacking people on the way to work." If I start listing, I'll miss somebody, but it seems we've all come full circle since now I get facebook messages from many of the people whose notes are in that box.
Lots of the letters carry foreign stamps. Missionaries from Brazil wrote to a little five year old who wanted to be a missionary. Friends have written from Romania, Mexico, Japan, Venezuela, Germany, and Belgium.
I'm humbled by finding the letter box. Who am I to have been blessed by God in this way? Who am I that all of these people would reach out to me and love me and point me to Christ? I'm challenged, too. Who is reading my words? The investment of a few moments of my time to write an encouraging note could an eternal reward.
Perhaps someday my children or nephews or niece will look through that box in wonder, cards and letters having been lost in the electronic marvels of IM and facebook and email. Or maybe they'll just be confused as to why I couldn't throw out all my junk but had to save a bunch of words. Those words changed me. They represent people who are a part of me through their involvement in my life. And I am so very thankful.
I'm taking a break from sorting through all my worldly belongings, an amazing amount of stuff for one "poor" person. There are three piles (and several sub-piles): stuff to get rid of, stuff to store, stuff to take to China. I'm trying to make the first pile the largest. The Karyn Store is officially open in the empty bedroom that was Joy's. Everything is free while supplies last. First come, first serve. After a day, all unclaimed stuff will be heading to Good Will. Joy already has a whole bunch of stuff from The Karyn Store in a layaway pile.
In my attempt to be ruthless in eliminating stuff from my life, I just finished going through an entire box of papers. I mean, who needs a bunch of old letters and cards anyway? After half an hour, it's obvious: I do. What a blessing to skim through that box! It was like the story of my life there in that box: my life as it has been influenced by hundreds of caring people.
What a hodge-podge and what a treasure! There were birthday cards, valentine cards, graduation cards, and cards for no occasion at all. Notes from teachers, school friends, my parents, college friends. Hilarious letters and really sad letters. So many people I can thank for giving of themselves to me.
I had a birthday card in there for every year while I was growing up from Pastor Roth. There wasn't just a signature, either, but a long note encouraging me each year. "I rejoice to see you following God." "Don't be tempted to become bitter about this situation." "God is our refuge." His were always words that were pointing me to Christ and showing me love and concern.
There are countless letters in that box from my mother. A tiny note of thanks from when I was a little girl and had helped her with something. Long letters while I was away at college. "I cry to think of you being so lonely there, but this is part of God's plan for you. Do not give up." "Always follow Him."
A few precious letters show the amazing person that was my grandma. "I try to grow old gracefully, but then my stubbornness just comes through!" My sisters wrote me the times that I was away from them. "We were talking at youth group about people doing funny things and I told them that you snore but you won't admit it." One very special note is from my daddy who wrote how proud he was of me after I sang in church as a young girl. Notes from my cousins and aunts are special. My "cousin" Phil must win some type of hilarious award because the letter from him at age 13 is so funny! "Guess what we're doing today. Picking beans. It is so booooring!" "Remember how Uncle Earl mows?"
Many of the letters are from friends. I've been overwhelming blessed with fantastic friends. There's a birthday card from my first best friend Andy when I turned four. Maybe his mom wrote it. Through elementary school, high school, and college, I had friends that wrote notes to me in good times and in bad times, encouraging me and loving me. Pleasant has written me letters since third grade. "Love your sis." From when she was first married and her car kept breaking down: "I told Joey that I need a new car and also a cell phone for safety and he said he'd get me a gun. I don't know what good that will do unless I want to start hijacking people on the way to work." If I start listing, I'll miss somebody, but it seems we've all come full circle since now I get facebook messages from many of the people whose notes are in that box.
Lots of the letters carry foreign stamps. Missionaries from Brazil wrote to a little five year old who wanted to be a missionary. Friends have written from Romania, Mexico, Japan, Venezuela, Germany, and Belgium.
I'm humbled by finding the letter box. Who am I to have been blessed by God in this way? Who am I that all of these people would reach out to me and love me and point me to Christ? I'm challenged, too. Who is reading my words? The investment of a few moments of my time to write an encouraging note could an eternal reward.
Perhaps someday my children or nephews or niece will look through that box in wonder, cards and letters having been lost in the electronic marvels of IM and facebook and email. Or maybe they'll just be confused as to why I couldn't throw out all my junk but had to save a bunch of words. Those words changed me. They represent people who are a part of me through their involvement in my life. And I am so very thankful.
Singing Along
I'm heading to China in 6 days, and I'm overwhelmed. Probably I'm supposed to be. I'm finding myself needy: emotionally, spiritually, physically. I'm finding myself doubting, trusting, crying, praying. Up and down my emotions go like a see-saw. My heart is aching from leaving my family and church family and yet every day I am longing more for these people that I only know through email and phone calls, these new coworkers and friends.
I'm already insufficient. I'm still so sinful. I thought I was unattached to possessions and yet my heart hurts, almost literally, to leave even a black and white neurotic border collie and a bunch of old books. This morning all I could think as I woke up was, "What a mess!" and I wasn't referring to my room, rather to my heart.
Notice the self-focus that keeps pulling me away. Away from the reason, the focus, the joy, the planner, the Comforter: away from Him. This morning I went out to the Cooks at 6:30 a.m. to feed the cats. What a blessing! Loaded with coffee, ipod, and the Book, I drove away into the country. I sat on their front porch and listened to birds and watched the flowers and talked to, meditated upon, and worshiped Him. And repented. Again. Still.
On the way home I sang along with Caedmon's Call, rejoicing in grace, in mercy, in the cross.
Awake My Soul
Thousand Miles
Mystery of Mercy
Romans 7:18-25
I'm already insufficient. I'm still so sinful. I thought I was unattached to possessions and yet my heart hurts, almost literally, to leave even a black and white neurotic border collie and a bunch of old books. This morning all I could think as I woke up was, "What a mess!" and I wasn't referring to my room, rather to my heart.
Notice the self-focus that keeps pulling me away. Away from the reason, the focus, the joy, the planner, the Comforter: away from Him. This morning I went out to the Cooks at 6:30 a.m. to feed the cats. What a blessing! Loaded with coffee, ipod, and the Book, I drove away into the country. I sat on their front porch and listened to birds and watched the flowers and talked to, meditated upon, and worshiped Him. And repented. Again. Still.
On the way home I sang along with Caedmon's Call, rejoicing in grace, in mercy, in the cross.
Awake My Soul
Thousand Miles
Mystery of Mercy
Romans 7:18-25
Monday, January 07, 2008
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